posted on July 06, 2004 @ 5:06 pm
this morning i got to thinking how everything changes in scale and profundity after a while.
as i approached the heb two miles down the street from my apartment, i realized it's the very store i'd ventured to with jennifer, layla, and jennifer&layla. we'd catch the 3 bus on rio grande and get off just across the street. i distinctly remember the time jennifer and i went alone, and i bought carnations. the bus was very late that day in picking us up from the store.
when my parents and i came to austin for orientation three years ago, the trip seemed to take forever, and the scenery was fascinating. when we got into town and ate at bennigan's (the one at 183 and I-35, i now know), i reeled as nine inch nails played over the PA. just getting to campus seemed to take forever, though it was only a few miles. the garage in which i now sit seemed an eternity away from the dorm entrance down the street. fumbling with the intricate map and swimming through buildings to get to the SSB, i wondered how on earth i would be able to walk back and forth from one edge of campus to the other without dying, or even worse, getting lost.
when jennifer and i drove to our first apartment, we eagerly counted down the miles to 232, the riverside dr. exit. everything seems so different in my memory, more ellaborate, more alive. the sun was bright, the kittens were meowing in their box on the back seat, oobi doobi munched in her cage, and i shot across lanes in order to exit. it looks more like my memory's rendition of dallas than plain little austin.
the interstate was intimidating, so i stayed on the frontage road a lot of the time. once i realized how much time this wasted, i grew some balls and sped with the best of them. i already had basic skills down, as derek commented on once in longview.
[going down gilmer road toward the loop, i cut through the eckerd's parking lot and cut off an oncoming car to get onto the loop. derek pointed out i wasn't in austin yet and needed to drive accordingly.]
driving on loop 360, out by the lake and the towers, ever wondering how to get to the top of the highest hills and the base of those lovely towers.
well, now that's just the heb i've driven too countless times in the past two weeks.
driving so often in traffic makes any road trip trivial, especially the 4.5 hour one to longview; i've done it so many times over the years.
i turned into that bennigan's parking lot in order to get into an apartment complex i was considering.
i'd love for everything to be so close as the dorm across the street from this garage. i traverse campus in 20 minutes (i'm slow). though i haven't been inside it for a year, i can still give directions to specific buildings.
though i often opt out of taking highways when i have somewhere to be, it's only because i've learned major time-saving shortcuts.
i've found the base of the towers. (and it was an amazing moment.)
all i've left to discover is how to get to the top of those sodding hills, but i've driven those hills and curves so many miles it lacks mystery.
i guess that's why i can never imagine living in one abode forever, much less one city. i always need something exciting and new to discover. i realize there's lots about my city i don't know despite the fact i've been here for three years. i'm sure if i had money and company to do those things it'd be a lot more fun. though one of those problems will be solved soon enough.
i'm assuming my constant need to go forth and, well, conquer maybe, stems from the fact i have no idea what's going on in my life. now or in the future. my subconscious seems to be attempting to lead me to various places in order to get to where i'm going. wherever that is.
yeah. whatever. this is no longer interesting to me. owen's around, so self-discovery time can wait until later.