posted on January 22, 2004 @ 6:52 pm
there's so much negative energy in genesis now i don't even like being there. you can literally feel this forcefield when you walk in the door. everything feels strange, and between janeane being overly affectionate and tima being in heat, it's all messing with my head. i'm sure janeane's new behavior is due to jennifer locking herself in her room on the rare ocassion she is home. we're like a family, the mom and kids, jennifer has abandoned. i told janeane we wouldn't be living with jennifer after a while, but he didn't say anything. it's so far off they don't need to know now. it's not like she ever does anything for them anymore anyway. i'm the one who cleans their litter box and feeds them and makes sure they have clean water to drink. i let janeane lie next to me on the futon when i'm trying to sleep, even though he's so large the space he takes up is greatly missed on that little futon. i find his puked-up hairballs and clean them up. i kiss tima and tell her she's the prettiest kittie even if she is loud when she's horny and her breath smells a little bad.
i didn't tell them jonathan died, either. they liked him a lot more when they were kittens since they lived at his house for a while, and he was the one feeding them usually. once i started showing up daily to clean the krusties from janeane's eye (his first name was "krusty eye") and feeding them and cleaning their tiny little poos up, they would at least not hide when i walked into their unused foyer.
anyway, thinking about living on my own is sort of intriguing. i can leave my bedroom door open all the time (the kitties can't be alone when i'm the only they've got) and control the electricity. why won't jennifer turn off her goddamned fan when she's not in the house?! i can't say the thought is exciting because, well, it's not. if the past three weeks are any sign of the next six months, however, i'll have that long to acclimate myself to being alone whilst at home.
the other night when jennifer spoke to me, it was as if a random person on the street stopped to ask why i was carrying a screwdriver. oh well, another chapter of my life drawn to a close.