posted on Monday, Apr. 02, 2007 @ 00:49
"i don't think mr. thundercleese likes you."
"good. that's the way i like it.""i like you.""well, quit it."in an alternate universe, i'm actually zorak.
i got into a fight with a guy the other night, but this time he didn't punch me. i ordered a new dining table and chairs from target.com and had to go pick it up at dhl. i was fairly confident it would squeeze into my car since it was not assembled. so owen and i are trying to fenagle this big ass box into the back seat or trunk of my car. (no, fenagle isn't really the right word there, but i really, really love that word. you know what i mean anyway, right? right.) we were obviously occupying part of the parking space next to us with my open doors and big ass box, and this dude in an old dirty jeep tries pulling into said space. his window was down, so i said, "can you please park in another space? we're trying to get this into my car." he simply stared me straight in the eye and continued to pull forward. i stepped over into the middle of the space and wouldn't budge, staring right back. finally he pulled into another space :gasp: a whole 10 feet away!
he gets out of his jeep with a couple of small
boxes, and as he passes asks, "what, are you reserving parking spaces
now?"
"yeah, i am, you got a problem with that?" [insert universal
"bring it on" hand and arm motions.]
"yeah, i do."
"well fuck
you. [middle finger] what are you gonna do about it?"
this prick gets back into his jeep, and as he's pulling away yells out the open window, "fucking cunt!" which was pretty cool cause i've been called a whore a million times. never a cunt, though. what a pussy, though, can't even insult me to my face.
the other day chris threw a red
sharpie at me without its cap, and it left a mark on my chest. i
scrubbed it, but it just turned my chest pink from blood flow and
diluted sharpie. the next day chris referenced my deformed titties, which
interested kyle. i said, "yeah, owen carved a swastika in
them."
kyle: "what! are you serious?"
me: ":laughing:
no..."
chris: "look at him. he was ready to throw down for
you."
kyle: "i was."
and people say no good comes from objectifying women...
umm hmm yesss welll... nothing interesting has happened lately at all. the other day i was nearly late for work because i was straightening my hair, only to discover it was raining outside. my hair is like one of those expanding dinosaurs that explodes to six times its size when it gets wet. one drop of water and POOF i have an afro. after i explained how the weather was cramping my style with this stunning analogy to the guy who works in the o's cart by the tower, he told me it looked nice and wasn't frizzy. nice of him to lie, amirite? the subject of this entry is how he delivered my total. kim says he has a crush on me, but i think he's just a nice guy who gets bored sitting in a booth all day. he does smoke, and i really appreciate the reckless abandon smokers seem to have in the face of this ridiculous health-conscious movement.
i do believe our painting is nearing a conclusion. the kitchen has been done, owen finished the bedroom today, and i've just got to get some finishing touches done in the bathroom. we signed our lease at the new complex saturday, and i get a 5% discount for working at UT. that's $39 a month, w00+!
WINDMILLS DON'T WORK THAT WAY! GOODNIGHT!
<3, chels
p.s. you totally don't know whence that quote came.
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