posted on October 07, 2004 @ 10:56 am
this is my 900th entry. i just happen to look at my profile wondering what i'd put in it forever ago, and saw there are 899 entries before this one.
so. i don't know what to do with myself.
i'd like to run away, as i am wont to do. i want to ship myself to another state and just start over. go to some community college to get the stupid shit out of the way, then transfer into a real one and learn some marketable skill. would they be able to find out if i lie and say i've never even been to college? it seems impossible to move anywhere without a marketable skill, though. i'll show up in some new place with hardly any money and no job. i suppose owen would be able to land some sort of something in advance.
doug said i couldn't afford to live in seattle, based upon what chris and tammy's house costs. however, for one it's a house with a basement, which i feel counts as a two-story house. for another, it's close to campus. doug spoke of the ridiculously expensive place they lived at in austin, and again, a house by campus. you can find something "cheap" anywhere. i looked at their apartment prices in seattle, and they weren't much more expensive than here. and i was looking at the cool apartment buildings that are round, downtown, etc. those, comparably, look not much more expensive.
there's still so much growing up i need to do, though. i can't imagine not being close enough to my family to just drive to them. i'm sure i would deal with it, but i don't know. it would just be really awful for a while. it's why i felt so guilty when owen moved down here.
anyway. i'm just tired and pms-y and unsettled. and my back hurts. and i'm hungry.