posted on August 14, 2003 @ 5:17 pm
"cigarettes and chocolate milk," mr. wainwright
"vans song," suicide machines
"authority song," jimmy eat world
"piano," last days of april
"how soon is now," smiths
they played rufus on that fox show the oc. hmph.
when i got to work, john (he who gave me 200 dreamcast cds to play with last week) asked about my game playing adventures during the past week.
"actually i haven't played one of them."
"aw!"
"i've been asleep for the past week. every night i sleep like 12 hours. i don't know what's wrong with me."
"that's a sign of what is called 'depression.'"
i didn't have time to respond, however. my paxil makes me sleep, but i haven't taken it in a few days. this morning at 4:30 while lying in bed and trying to sleep, i started thinking (bad, bad chelsea) and getting really sad. i teared up a bit but ultimately just sucked it up and fell asleep. i need to take my drugs.
i told jennifer about my dream as we were cooking supper (at midnite, heh), and she told me the one she'd had. she was being chased to be killed, too, and i was in it. it was odd.
i want the weather to get cold. i miss walking around. :( it was so nice when i lived in the dorm, being able to get my pimp coat and fit my cigarettes and lighter into one of the pockets and walk aimlessly in the middle of the night. i want that back! i'm going to end up parking in one of the garages and just walking up and down the drag, on down guadelupe and lamar. i think it's part of my need to run away. i can go away by myself, but i know the 1 [bus] can take me to travis waiting on 27th or brazos when i get tired of walking.
blah. enough of this crap. i'm playing cubis and finishing bryan's massive survey.
"no no nothing's here. when you dress up in black, when you let them attack, when you close your eyes to all that's bright. i'll lead you through it all. there's no one better, nothing than you."
<3, chelsea.
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