posted on Friday, Mar. 18, 2005 @ 08:12
when i still lived at home, and especially when i was younger, my mom would sometimes wake me up by singing to me. she'd come close to my face and sing,
good morning to you, good morning to you
you look like a monkey
:sniff, sniff, sniff, sniff:
and you smell like one, too.
i usually got this on birthdays, holidays, etc. well, yesterday morning a little before 8:00 a.m. i got a call from my mom, and she sang that song. it'd been forever since i'd heard it, so it was really great. she called to wish me happy billy corgan's birthday. i ♥ my mom so much.
yesterday after work i met a couple of people in my apartment complex. the first was a man in his 30s or 40s, wearing a sweatshirt and bright blue sweatpants that showed off the first couple inches of his crack. he was balding and walked with a strange limp that reminded me of the way tommy walks, since one of his legs is longer than the other.
as i was walking to the mailboxes, holding a purring raz, i saw him round the corner with the same destination. as i entered the little alcove he looked up at me, and i looked at him. for a couple seconds we held stares, then i said pleasantly, "hi!"
"oh...hello. [pause, while looking at raz] is the other cat over there yours, too?"
i didn't know which one he was talking about, since there are so many. he had a childish aura around him that manifested in his voice and the way he spoke. i replied, "no, this one isn't even mine. i just like to pet her. i have two cats, but they stay inside."
"is that one pregnant?"
"no, she's just really fat."
"cats around here eat well."
simultaneously as we were going through our mailboxes we dropped our junk mail, and he muttered about always getting it.
when i walked back to my apartment, with raz following closely since i had to hold the mail, i got owen's GBA and sat outside with raz. soon after a cat i'd never seen walked up and sat down near us. he was huge and white, with grey and beige smears on his body, and brilliant blue eyes. he was obviously a house cat; i pet him with no effort, and he nuzzled me as i did.
i saw on his name tag, "i miss my mom. please call" and a number. i figured if he missed his mom he may be strictly an indoor cat, so i called the number. a woman in her 30s or 40s answered, and we ended up talking for about three minutes. we talked about her cats and my cats, mainly. her name's rhonda. when i told her my name she misunderstood and asked, "shelty? like the dog?" i had to spell it for her. she lives in an apartment at the other end of my building, so she told me when she gets her mail she'd come down to my apartment and he'd follow her home.
of course soon after this he walked off, and i couldn't catch him, but he only went to the building across from mine. as i played zelda i heard a woman call my name. she was wearing pants and a shirt that was too long, and smoking one of those mini-cigars. raz came walking up (a passerby had scared her off), and when rhonda saw her she exclaimed about how small her legs were, and how she'd never seen that kind of cat in person before. i told her it was ironic because the cat next door has absurdly long legs. she pointed out her other cat on the other side of the pool, aurora, a calico like raz but not as fat. ;)
raz and i lounged for an hour and a half. at one point she was lying against my leg with her head resting on it, and the guy who drives the geo and the motorcycle walked up. when i started moving my he-man cartridge fell from my lap, which startled raz. then when he came nearer she jumped again and went underneath a bush. he looked at me smiling, and chuckled. then i saw his parents arrive in a lincoln. he said proudly, "look, mom, that's my motorcycle!"
when owen got home we went to see in the realms of the unreal. it was really good. i think it won the best documentary academy award, you know, one of those categories most people don't know exist. we're going to go see the ring 2 tomorrow. hopefully it won't suck.
after the movie we went to maudie's, figuring there would at least be one open table at 9:15 p.m. i pulled in behind a really big truck.
exhibit a.
so the truck turned into those spaces on the left, then stopped and put its reverse lights on. i was too close for it to move anyway, so i went behind it into the space right in front of the restaurant. i figured they were going to correct themselves into the last space, you know? when i did that, they honked at me, and a little woman got out of the passenger side and ran up to my window. this chick is shorter than i am (and i am but wolverine's height), super skinny, with blonde hair and fake nails. her nasty ass nails tapped on my window, and i was enraged at the idea of this heiffer pecking at something that isn't hers. i looked at her with my eyebrows up, to convey what the fuck do you want? in the most irritating, chipmunk voice she said, "excuse me, excuse me, we were backing up to get this space."
i mouthed, "ok."
she kept looking at me, i guess expecting an apology, but i returned a blank stare. she finally said, "ok..." and walked off. when i turned the car off and we got out, she started up again from over where the truck was, saying i stole her parking space. she kept repeating, "excuse me, you took our parking space. excuse me, excuse me."
we didn't even look at her, just going into the patio. turns out there was a waiting list with three names on it, so we just decided to go elsewhere. as we were leaving, they were entering, and she said, "are y'all leaving?! excuse me!" yeah bitch, that's right, i didn't even want the space. i just took it so you couldn't have it! eat it. it wasn't until we had left that i thought to get their LP and mail them something disturbing, pictures of dead children and whatnot (thanks murman.com!).
anyhoo. we ended up going to mexican restaurant. its name is flores, but it's not in lights on the facade. it just says, "mexcian restaurant," so we refer to it as the generic mexican restaurant. no dickwads there.
christ a-mighty this is long. i guess i'll go try and do the crossword from yesterday. :sigh: i can't believe it's only 9:00 a.m. at least i killed an hour writing this.