posted on February 04, 2004 @ 6:34 pm
saturday afternoon after work, my car wouldn't start. he would click, and the lights blinked like he was having a seizure. jennie tried jumping it, but a PTS guy had to come and do it with his truck. cat was on campus, so he came over and with me to o'reilly's for them to test the battery. he said the battery was fine, it just needed recharging.
we went to layla's and hooked up travis to her car. after much arguing over how the cables should be hooked up and for how long, i said with tears in my eyes and a knot in my throat, "i don't care! i just want to go home." we went instead to cats to make sure the bolts connecting the battery were firmly in place. the positive end had corroded so badly that it broke off.
i sat with his sister and her two kids watching law and order svu while his father drove in from san antonio. we went to wal-mart to buy a new one, and then cat put it in for me. i'm always really afraid around people's parents because i assume they'll hate me, and i could really seeing the father of someone like cat hating me. he was nice, though.
so saturday i left at 8:00 a.m. and got home a little after midnite. fun times.
my flowers are growing so largly. the biggest is six inches in diameter. that's why i like spider mums; i had one once that was over eight inches in diameter.
i took pictures of janeane yesterday afternoon. when i woke up he got on top of me and settled down. cat and i went "job hunting," which means i ate, we browsed through 33 degrees, drove around north austin knowing where we were but not quite how that connected with lake austin blvd., and sat on mozart's deck for a while. ooh i saw a cool bumper sticker, too. we ate at sonic despite my boycott. :hangs her head: oh well.
i painted two more walls yellow this morning and made a "found art" sculpture with the body parts bryan and laura gave me for my birthday. what were you doing at 6:00 a.m.?
the other night i had a little panic attack. i told mom about it and that i managed to not inflict bodily harm, but she keeps telling me, "you have to look at the good things and remain positive."
"did you not hear me when i said i didn't swallow all the pills in the house and stayed downstairs because i found my razor blade in my medicine cabinet?" she called today for no reason and told me she loved me. that was sort of strange. i don't mean to freak her out with this masochism shit, but i have to tell her. i have to talk about everything with her. i don't understand why other people don't see the fact i'm still standing as proof i am looking at the positive things and carrying a positive disposition most the time.
oh well, whatever. the weather today is really pretty. it stormed all day and it's cold. mmm cold and rainy.
<3, chels.
p.s. the birds are still sleeping. if you see any near you, you'd better watch out. death's coming.
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