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posted on 2002-04-16 @ 12:18 a.m.

saturday was a nice day. when i got off of work, marc and i went to kerbey lane. he paid for it, too, which makes me feel sort of bad; i didn't have any cash or anything to give him. when we got back, jenn and i went to 7-11 to get ice cream, and then we watched snl at her room. the rock was on, and it was really funny. i was talking to michael online, and he said he was hungry. jenn and i went with him to 6th street at 1:00 a.m. to see if hard rock cafe was open. it was so scary, all the people. this one bum came up to michael and said his pipe was broken, that he had a hole in it and was wondering if michael had anything green he could put in it. we ended up just going to player's by school, and then drove around the lake and surrounding hills til 3:30 a.m. it was so wonderful.

as for now, however, i'm contemplating suicide. i couldn't sleep last night because i felt like i was going to throw up. i went to the bathroom at 3:00 a.m. because i was all like, ok, this is it, vomit's coming. but alas, there was no vomit to be seen. :sigh: i wanted to put my finger down my throat, but i can still not bring myself to do it. my head hurts so badly, and i'm really dizzy. last night at 10:00 i went to get something to eat really quickly, and it was so hard to walk that one block. i couldn't even walk in a straight line; i probably looked drunk. so i'm going to sit here and ache and talk to jonathan. o_O

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